More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
This baby is an asshole
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize