Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
