I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize