I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
