I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize