I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I think my moral compass just broke
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
