I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
