My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize