Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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