There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
