need another drink. this is the easiest way
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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