My liver just broke up with me...
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
