Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
