that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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