I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize