I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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