I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
My first STD was from a foam party
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
