i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
