Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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