Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
