The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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