rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I think I am morally bankrupt
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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