I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
