the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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