They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
