we have officially lost it.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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