that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
