Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
God, I missed his penis.
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