Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize