My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
