Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
