I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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