I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
