therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Are we still banned from the library?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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