so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Randomize
