Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
