i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
where are you?
Hypothermia
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
