Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
