I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
