she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
