it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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