She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize