one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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