Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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