i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Randomize
