Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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