Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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