I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
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