drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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