How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize