is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
