So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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