You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
